A Tongue In Cheek Bedtime Story by Ed
Roman
You can only tell it to your children after you buy an Ed Roman Guitar
!!!
Maybe if you tell it to your wife, She will give you her permission
to buy one.
Gold-Tone Adamantium frets are surely one of the breakthrough products that Ed
Roman is making available to his customers. These revolutionary frets are
made from 24 Kt Gold, Titanium. Unobtainium & some other un named alloys.
Designed & developed by Rick Turner & Ed Roman; we cannot get it patented
so we have opted not to divulge the formula (Secret Sauce).
When something gets patented you actually have to share your secret with the US
Patents & Trademark Bureau. Then they print it for all to see as a matter of
public record. We decided not to patent it !!!!
Code
Named Adamantium
These frets are harder
and stronger than traditional Nickel Silver Frets. Yet they don't sound too
bright like Stainless Frets. In fact they sound like Nickel Silver but they
polish up smoother, brighter & glossier. These frets are a perfect alternative
for stainless steel frets.
See Just How Crazy, I Really Am !!
(Read the rest of the page.)
The
story of the Code Name Adamantium frets is a closely guarded
secret. Ed Roman literally had to dig a 7 mile tunnel to break into the 4th
underground level of the Pentagon to acquire the chemical
compound formula. He then had to construct a time machine to
go back to the 40's to spy on it's inventor
metallurgist Dr. Myron MacLain. Roman
was obsessed to find out the secret of keeping the process
of manufacturing stable enough to avoid destroying the
planet into a cataclysmic vapor cloud. If he destroyed the
planet, there would have been no customers left to purchase
his guitars.
To gain the necessary components he had to
build a starship and travel 1.400,000 light years to the distant reaches of the
Pulsar Galaxy to get enough raw materiel to build frets for his guitar lines. To
do this within one lifetime he was forced to design the "Abstract Equation"
which he evolved from the Dymaxion Dynasty of ancient Egypt.
Simply put the Abstract Equation creates a slight time
shift in the Universe allowing a network of black holes to open and shut in
varying high speed sequences. This allows the traveler to travel incredible
distances and actually get there before he left. To acquire a map of these
endless pathways Ed had to use the time machine one more time and go back to
ancient Greece, He had to scale Mt. Olympus and gain an audience with Zeus,
Using his incredible salesmanship & persuasive gift of gab.
Ed Roman eventually actually conned it out of Zeus, He
actually promised to give Zeus the Golden Fleece!!!! This was to the amazement of his wife
Hera who said it was a Golden Fleecing !!!!
She was just about to
put a curse on Ed, but he quickly parasailed off the top of Mount Olympus thereby
avoiding her screams, vile epithets and of course the deadly curse.
The Definition of
Adamantium
The McGonigle dictionary
Adamantium is a virtually indestructible
man-made steel alloy which does not occur in nature and
whose exact chemical composition is a United States
government classified secret. Adamantium is not an element.
It's properties do not qualify it for any known space on the
Periodic Table of Elements. Rather, Adamantium is a series
of closely related compounds of iron created through a
secret process discovered by the American metallurgist Dr.
Myron MacLain.
MacLain began experimenting with the
process that created Adamantium as a young scientist in the
employ of the United States government in the early 1940s.
Assigned to create a super-metal with which to build tanks,
MacLain labored for months, experimenting with various iron
alloys. One of his experiments utilized the rare meteoric
ore now known as Wakandan Vibranium. He tried to fuse the
Vibranium to the iron alloy numerous times without success.
Then one night when he dozed off, some as yet unknown factor
entered the process, and permitted the fusion to occur. Upon
discovering his success, MacLain poured the molten metal
into a disc-shaped mold. The disc, once solidified, has
proven to be the most impervious object ever created on
Earth. MacLain turned the discovery over to the government
and it was given to Captain America to use as his shield.
Neither MacLain nor anyone else has ever been able to
discover what was the x-factor that entered the process, or
has been able to fuse Vibranium with another metal. (The
unknown iron-Vibranium alloy of which the shield is composed
resembles True Adamantium, although Adamantium itself
contains no Vibranium,)
Over the following decades MacLain experimented,
attempting to duplicate the process that create the shield.
Finally, in recent years, he succeeded in developing the
process by which the substance known as True Adamantium is
created. True Adamantium is nearly as strong as Captain
America's shield, and is, for all practical purpose,
indestructible. The degree of impermeability varies directly
with the thickness of the Adamantium. A direct blow from
Thor's hammer, conveyed with the thunder god's full
strength, will slightly dent a solid cylinder of True
Adamantium. A sufficient mass of Adamantium could survive a
direct hit from a nuclear weapon.
Adamantium is created through the mixing of certain
chemical resins whose composition is a United States
government secret. For eight minutes after the resins are
mixed, the Adamantium can be molded into a particular shape
as long as it is kept at a temperature of 1,500 degrees
Fahrenheit. After this brief period the process of creating
Adamantium is completed. The extremely stable molecular
structure of the Adamantium prevents it from being molded
further, even if the temperature remains high enough to keep
it in liquefied form. Only a device celled a Molecular
Rearranger can alter the form of hardened Adamantium.
The United States government has shared the secret of
Adamantium's composition with certain of its allies, and the
secret has also fallen into the hands of various criminals,
such as the Constrictor, who has made special weaponry from
Adamantium. Wolverine possesses artificial claws made of
True Adamantium and his bones have been fused with
Adamantium in an unexplained manner so as to greatly
increase their tensile strength. The outer portion of the
robotic body of Ultron is also composed entirely of True
Adamantium, although Ultron's inner mechanisms are not.
Adamantium is extraordinarily expensive to produce.
Therefore, certain parties who wish to use Adamantium on a
large scale have resorted to utilizing a similar but
somewhat weaker compound similar to True Adamantium called
Secondary Adamantium. Although Secondary Adamantium is still
far stronger than even titanium steel, it can be destroyed
by sufficiently great amounts of force. Blastaar's energy
discharges and the vibratory force created by the Overkill
Horn have both proved able to destroy Secondary Adamantium.
The sentient computer known as F.A.U.S.T. had a casing made
of Secondary Adamantium which Thor and Iron Man managed to
destroy. The Red Skull and the original Hate-Monger had a
dome of Secondary Adamantium constructed to protect their
island fortress but the dome was destroyed by the vibratory
force of the Overkill Horn and by powerful incendiary bombs.
Ed Roman & his small band of merry men
& crazed luthiers in their insane search for the most
insdestructable metal in the universe finally succeeded
where all others had failed.
And They All Lived Happily Ever After.
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Gold Adamantium Frets
See The Abstract
Kingpin
More Adamantium Stories
For The True Geeks Like Me !!!!!!
Types of Adamantium
This type is the mother of all
Adamantium's; it is impossible to break. It could withstand
a nuclear bomb, though Thor with all his strength and
Mjolnir has slightly dented a small cylinder of it. Being
this strong, it is very rare and expensive to
create/manipulate and is top secret in the US government,
though it has shared it with some of their "allies".
This type is much more easier to work
with, making it much more cost effective though at the
expense of its strength. Someone with super-strength (say
the Hulk) can break it or warp it. Also referred to as
Adamantium Steel.
This was created by an experiment
involving Wolverine. As a side effect of bonding true
adamantium with his bones, and his rapid healing ability
there was a molecular change which has adapted adamantium to
the biology of normal bone. This Adamantium acts like a
biological component, regenerating as his bones do.
Russia wanted to create its own type of
Adamantium, and thus Carbonadium was born. This form of
Adamantium is not as durable as true Adamantium, but it is
also flexible. For most purposes, however, Carbonadium is
still virtually indestructable. Omega Red is probably the
best known to use this metal with his tentacles, which act
as a conduit for his energy draining powers.
Breaking the Unbreakable
Though adamantium is said to be
unbreakable and indestructible, there have been instances
when objects made of the metal have been damaged. Images in
Gallery.
Wolverine: The End
In Wolverine: The End, a tale that told
about an elderly Wolverine in the future, some of Logan's
claws were broken. How they got in this condition was never
specified.
In the still-unfinished miniseries
Ultimate Wolverine Vs Hulk, it appears like Hulk breaks
adamantium when he rips the mutant in half. Upon closer
inspection and the application of a little logic, it's
becomes apparent that though Hulk did rip Wolverine apart,
he didn't actually break adamantium. For the clearest
explanation as to why Wolverine's spine, but not the
adamantium, could be broken, read the following.
Satyrquaze says:
"As far as Hulk breaking Wolverine in half... (quick
biology and metallurgy lesson here) Despite propaganda saying otherwise,
Wolverine's skeleton is not completely coated with adamantium, if it were he
couldn't move. Adamantium porously coats each bone individually (and it would
have to be porous because blood and oxygen is required to get inside the bone
to the marrow for a person to live). Also there is a malleable disc between
each bone (especially in vertebrae in the spine) which allows freedom of
movement along with joints and ligaments (which wouldn't be coated in
adamantium if Wolverine hopes to do things like walk, stand, move in the
slightest...).Now what Hulk did was indeed rip Logan apart, but it's most
likely that Wolverine's spine separated at it's weakest point (the discs
between each vertebra) and everything tore apart quite easily from there. So
no, Hulk more than likely didn't break Adamantium at all in this instance. Not
to say that he couldn't if suitably pissed."
Hulk can damage Adamantium, or at least
Adamantium alloys but he did not do so in
this instance.
Captain America's Shield
Captain America's shield, which is an
Adamantium-Vibranium alloy, has been broken five times in
the history of comics. The Molecule Man once destroyed the
shield (along with Mjolnir, Namor's indestructible armor,
and the Silver Surfer's board) by unmaking them on the
molecular level. Klaw and Dr. Doom (both amped by the power
of The Beyonder) damaged the shield on separate occasions.
Thanos, wielding the Infinity Gauntlet, effortlessly
shattered the shield with a backhand. Finally, Thor
destroyed the shield with eye beams in an alternate
universe.
Old 1940' Classic Captain America Comic
Beating Hitler's Ass
In this photo His shield was not made of Adamantium
Captain America Was the First Marvel Comic Book Superhero
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